Brought to you by Jeff Thoren, DVM, ACC  

“What makes great bosses different from ordinary ones?  Put them in a line-up and you wouldn’t be able to see which is which. However, put them in a time-up, comparing how they spend their days, and differences show themselves. For one, typical bosses devote a great deal of time to answering questions whereas the great ones devote to an exceptional amount of time to asking them.” - Dale Dauten

Whether we’re a boss or not, questions can be one of the most effective communication tools available to us.  Strong relationships, strategic plans, shared values and purpose, and the meaningful exchange of ideas and information are all products of asking skillful questions.

Let’s look at why the ability to ask skillful questions is so powerful and consider some specific exercises you can try to develop your skillful-questioning aptitude.

Here’s this month’s feature ...

Powerful Questions Can Have a Powerful Effect by Jamie Walters

Inc Magazine September 2001

Highlights from the article:

• Questions are the means we use to uncover new information, to compare our perspective with reality, and to learn more about what others are thinking and perceiving. When we don't ask questions, we're assuming that we know everything there is to know about the subject or the person. 
    

• Here’s how you can tap into the power of questions:

1. Interpersonally - Asking questions demonstrates that you're listening (and actually helps you to listen), which always helps to strengthen relationships. By setting a goal to ask several questions in all of your interactions, you'll gain powerful information to improve your own performance, strengthen relationships, and reduce misunderstandings.
     

2. Intrapersonally - Only the "examined life" is worth living.  Yet this isn't as easy to do as it is to say, particularly in Western cultures where people will do just about anything to avoid being quiet and focusing inward. Quiet reflection is the fertile ground that yields insightful questions and responses (not to mention that trains us to sharpen our powers of observation and listen to others more skillfully).
     

3. To Suspend Assumptions - Inquiry is a key element of dialogue, which encourages us to suspend assumptions to more fully understand another person's perspective. In day-to-day interactions, assumptions often lead to miscommunications, mismatched expectations, stress, damaged relationships, or unfulfilled responsibilities. The simple act of clarifying and confirming what you understand to be true, and seeing if others have a similar understanding, can eliminate the negative consequences of making too many assumptions.
     

4. To Communicate Clearly - Any unasked (and thus, unanswered) question, is a trap door waiting to open under your feet. For example, imagine not asking a client what her desired outcome is. How will you reach a goal that you don't know about? Take time to ask thoughtful questions. This is a tremendous way to demonstrate your respect for people and their ideas, which motivates and brings out the best in them.

  
For the full text article, go to ...
http://www.inc.com/articles/2001/09/23385.html

   
Flex, Build, and Hone Your Ability to Ask Powerful Questions

Asking skillful questions requires much more than putting a question mark at the end of a thought.  Use these four exercises to develop your skill:

1. Ask before advocating. In your next meeting or conversation, try to ask a sincere, relevant question before advocating your point - in every instance. The topic of your questions might include gathering more information, clarifying a statement or perspective that someone shared, or asking for other participants' thoughts. Be sure to notice how the tenor of the interaction changes, and how people respond.

2. Examine past assumptions. Think of an instance when you or someone else made an assumption, and when the outcome of the interaction was poor or less than ideal. Write down at least five questions you could have asked during that interaction to prevent assumptions from being made.

3. Inquire, don't interrogate. Thoughtful questions are a powerful tool for learning more and fostering understanding, yet no one likes to be interrogated! As with any other communication tool, be aware of your own intention for asking the question (e.g. learning more versus attacking someone else's idea), as well as the tone of your voice, body language, and word choice.

4. A step you can take right now. Identify at least three opportunities you have in the next week to practice using inquiry and probing questions. (Meetings, impromptu phone calls, conversations with friends, and e-mail replies are all potential opportunities.)

  
Next Month

A unique task of leadership is to initiate a future that is distinct from the past.  Leaders who know how to convene, question, and listen are more effective at affecting organizational change.  They realize that real change is dependent on creating strong communities.

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